Being a Woman Does Not Make You a Feminist, Thinx

Last week, Thinx “She-EO” Miki Agrawal blew up headlines when it was revealed that she had been sexually harassing female employees on the regular. Groping employees’ boobs and butts, commenting on them in front of others, asking to see nipple piercings, talking about her own forays into female ejaculation, video conferencing while pooping, all in the name of “breaking taboos” about the female body.

Totes, girl. I got you. It’s not sexual harassment because you’re a) not a lesbian or bi, just hetero-curious and b) you were really enthusiastically supportive about nipple piercings. Anyone going, “hey what about ‘this is a workplace, can I maybe keep my boobs inside my bra,’” needs to #FreeTheNipple, whether they want to or not.

Plus everyone needs to talk about poop. Heck, let’s remove the doors from all bathroom stalls in America to really get the conversation going.

So is she a feminist?

“I only started relating to being a feminist, literally, right when I started my company,” she told New York magazine last year. “Every time I thought about the word ‘feminist,’ I thought about an angry, ranty girl.”

Omg, totally. She definitely doesn’t use the mantle of feminism to promote her feminist period products, while being a terrible feminist herself.

“But I learned so much in the past few years about the plight of women …”

Did she learn about that while violating employees boundaries left and right? Not to mention she sounds a whole helluva lot like a beta-male douchebag who, like, just realized women are fucked by the patriarchy all the time, bro. Thanks for the update.

“What I tell my team every day is that we have to be accessible. We have to build a bridge to redefining what feminism is.”

Hoo boy, we now know what she means by “we have to be accessible.”

Nonsense like this is a good reminder that simply being a woman does not make you a feminist, nor does it excuse whatever assholery you get up to, such as non-consensually groping your underlings (or anyone, for that matter).

New plan: Anyone claiming to be a feminist needs to pass both a written and oral exam (that’s “oral” as in speaking, not cunnilingus. Although …) on reproductive and economic rights, intersectionality, and consent. Every time you grab a boob in the name of sisterhood, your feminist license is suspended. Three strikes and you’re out of the club.