Lifestyle Tips From The Lifestyle Bitch

Now you can read us on your iPhone and iPad! Check out the BTRtoday app.

Recently, I dove pretty deep into the realm of home-improvement and all around space beautification. Its never been something that I’ve spent all that much time or money on, but as I’ve begun “adulting,” I’ve realized how much joy it brings me to make my living space a pleasant place to be, rather than just a crash pad. Call me crazy!

The other day I was walking around my newly minted apartment (complete with orchid, record player, and hanging plants)–I was in a Kimono, burning sandalwood and drinking a glass of honey-lemon water infused with a number of health tinctures. That’s when it hit me, I’d–at least momentarily–become somebody I never thought I could. Messy little me, disorganized, dirty, and lazy, had come to embody a strange alter-ego. I’d become The Lifestyle Bitch.

Well, since it’s already happened, I might as well lean into it. Here are a few bafflingly unnecessary homemaking directives that will make you feel like your apartment is bound for the cover of a magazine.

1. Make cute labels: If you’ve got exposed shelves, like I and any respectable lifestyler has, let the world know how downright quaint and creative you really are. Replace the generic labels on your pepper, your olive oil, or your plain mason jar full of rice with adorable hand-written ones, covered in freehand illustrations.

2. Buy succulents: They’re trendy, they’re beautiful, but (most importantly) they require little to no maintenance for upkeep. They were meant to survive in the desert for God’s sake! You can certainly keep one alive in your apartment. Pro tip: don’t overwater!

3. Stock a bar: There’s nothing more lifestyle-y than being able to make cocktails at a moment’s notice when your guests arrive. What’s my biggest must have? Campari! A Campari soda is the perfect sophisticated, simple drink for the sophisticated, simple you.

I know you haven’t thanked me yet, but you will.
The Lifestlye Bitch