Food Travesty: Oreo Bagel

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For the life of me, I cannot understand why people insist on sullying the few great pleasures in life. Yet, time and time again, I am disappointed at the sheer lack of respect and foresight that individuals employ.

That’s right, I’m talking about the Oreo Bagel. Once more, I am shocked and appalled at the unnecessary and sacrilegious combination of two discrete, divine pleasures.

Bagels–perfect and savory, filling, the ideal receptacle for smoked fish and schmear, the food of my people.

Oreos–my go-to guilty pleasure food, a relic of my youth, a cookie with a million possibilities; to be eaten with milk or with peanut butter or on a hot summer day when the interior frosting has melted just a little bit.

Separate, they are perfect. Each independently vibrant and alive. So why, why, why?!

POPSUGAR food has posted an appalling, downright hard to watch, video for a recipe of this catastrophe. Twenty perfectly good Oreos, gone to dust, and for naught! The final product looks like a sad, depleted, version of two foods I hold near and dear to my heart. Watch, if you dare.

This is my final plea to the food world: for the love of all things sacred, stop the madness. Let the snacks lie where they may. Enough is enough.